Subspace, also known as headspace, flight, or floating, is an altered mental state that some people achieve during very intense BDSM play. This intense mind/body experience can be felt as a state of euphoria or a trance-like adrenaline rush, and is essentially a natural chemical high. While many people share similar sensations, it can be described in different ways. So what exactly is subspace in BDSM? And how can you get there?
A subspace is an altered mental state that can be experienced during BDSM or other types of kinky play, generally for submissives. This wonderful and euphoric (or sometimes, confusing and disorienting) sensation is caused by neurochemical changes in the brain. During a particularly intense BDSM session, subspace can be entered with intense emotional and physical stimulation, invoking strong physical responses, including prolonged adrenaline surges. Essentially, chemicals are the highway to subspace!
What is subspace in a BDSM game?
So how can you sense subspace? This can be a controversial topic, as no one's experience with subspace is exactly the same. Some may feel a tingling or warmth enveloping their bodies, while others feel calm, peaceful, and serene. Almost everyone reports heightened sensations and a deep trance-like or floating state that may even feel like an external experience, a dream state, euphoria, or a trance.
Some people experience subspace so deeply that they become unconscious of their surroundings, body, sense of self or others, and even time and space itself. As if the mind and body are bifurcated, the mind shuts down completely and they may be unaware or unable to control their actions. You may experience tunnel vision (as in you can only see straight ahead), difficulty focusing, concentrating or thinking clearly, and reduced coordination and ability to express yourself.
What is important about subspace in BDSM?
The intensity of subspace means it's even more important to trust your partner, feel safe in and know you're with someone you trust. Someone who will respect your boundaries and tend to your needs. Some people may feel blissful, but the outward impression may seem a bit disorganized (after all, they are no longer "in their body"!). They may have "glassy eyes" or be unable to focus their gaze, as if in a dream or intoxicated. They may have trouble moving on their own, changing positions, sitting up straight, standing or walking without support. They may be incoherent or laugh, babble, chatter, or be unable to respond. In these cases, it is important to pause or stop the game until your partner is able to regain mental presence and check in to ensure their well-being and consent.
What causes subspace?
This dream-like or hypnotized state of subspace is caused by chemical reactions in the body. Many chemicals contribute to intense feelings, as natural morphine-like chemicals pump into the brain!
Adrenaline
First, adrenaline is released at the beginning of an intense game and continues to be released with more stimulation throughout the game. Adrenaline is responsible for increased pain tolerance and feeling of euphoria. The body sends a rush of endorphins that the body needs. The more pleasure or pain experienced, the more endorphins are released! The best way to regenerate adrenaline? Continuous stimulation! (Ideally, this increases over time as you build up a tolerance for the sensations.)
Dopamine
Dopamine is also released and is associated with sexual arousal. The dopamine builds and builds to a climax. Therefore, foreplay increases dopamine levels – and the more dopamine is produced, the more intensely you will experience this natural high.
Prolactin
Another hormone, prolactin, intensifies the dream-like experience by inhibiting dopamine uptake. This is responsible for the relaxation that occurs after climax – your brain cuts off dopamine and begins to calm down as you enter a trance.
Cortisol
Cortisol is also released during subspace. In its most basic form, cortisol initiates your fear and pain, which can give you a fight or flight response. However, in a dynamic where you trust your partner, you can relax into the experience. Studies show that this stress response doesn't actually trigger fight, flight, or freeze. Paradoxically, kinkers experience euphoria as cortisol rises, perhaps because they feel so safe during their body's natural stress response!
Oxytocin
This can also be linked to the release of oxytocin, a hormone known as the 'love hormone'. This creates a feeling of connection and closeness, and is also associated with orgasm. Oxytocin reduces stress and enhances feelings of closeness, affection, and closeness after sex or a BDSM scene, especially when you feel cared for with intimacy and care.
All these chemicals help you reach subspace, and it can be further intensified with multiple orgasms, different types of sensations and tempos, as well as physical and mental BDSM play.
How to get to the subspace
Now that you know what subspace is in BDSM… how do you get there? To work with your body's natural chemicals, you can use a variety of play techniques (both mental and physical) to bring chemicals to your brain that will help you reach subspace during sex or BDSM scene. The goal is to gradually increase the intensity of the game over time (within your limits and comfort zone) to continuously release endorphins and other chemicals that contribute to the slow-reinforcement subspace.
Keep in mind that it is always important to respect your boundaries and only push your boundaries to the extent that you feel comfortable doing so. You can continue with one activity that you enjoy throughout the experience, or you can continually increase the intensity of different techniques to get more and more intense!
A subspace map
1. There are no endorphins at the beginning of the scene. As soon as pain/pleasure is initiated, the body's endorphin reserve begins to be released.
2. As you begin to play, spend about ten minutes of relatively light but continuous stimulation (light tapping, gentle whipping), to encourage the body to start making those endorphins. If you want to explore with sex toy instead of a kick game, try using it bullet vibrator on the lowest setting first, then increase the sensation. Bullet vibrators are a great choice because they can be deep and boisterous, or intensely powerful!
3. After these ten minutes of gentle play, spend about five minutes building up to about 10 to 15 seconds of intense pain/pleasure stimulation (more intense whipping, whatever activities you enjoy), just above the current pain/pleasure threshold. This will encourage the body to release endorphins into the bloodstream and increase pain tolerance and pleasure, without still being in an altered state of consciousness.
4. Continue with about ten minutes of gentle, light, continuous stimulation to encourage the body to create more endorphins. Then, repeat with another 5 minutes of intensity at the previous higher intensity level.
5. End that play set with ten seconds to a minute of very intense, overstimulation (with your consent, of course, but pushing the limits of your pain/pleasure tolerance), which will release another round of endorphins and begin to bring you into a new headspace. You may feel a bit sluggish and trance-like, your eyelids may appear droopy, and you may feel more relaxed than before.
6. Get used to this and move on. As before, have ten minutes of relatively mild stimulation at the new level, followed by a five-minute build-up. Then an intense sensation of 10 to 15 seconds to release the next flow of endorphins. This next level of headspace can feel like being drugged. You may even feel hypersensitive, so that a small sensation can lead to a heightened response in the body.
7. Back off within ten minutes of any relatively mild stimulation. With heightened sensations, your moans and sighs will be longer and deeper, your body may even be limp, and your body's reactions will be obvious. It may be harder and harder to respond soberly.
8. For the next five minutes, switch it up with intensity for 10 to 30 seconds, releasing more endorphins and bringing you into subspace, a trance-like state of ecstasy that very clearly feels like an altered state of consciousness.
For the end…
When exploring subspace, it's essential to be with a partner you trust to respect your needs and boundaries throughout the game. As excited as you are to try it out, this is not a place you'd want to explore with a new partner. Make sure you're both on the same page about the game and the limitations, and be aware of the signs you're approaching or in subspace. Agree on the type of game you'll explore once you're there, when you'll stop, and the kind of care you'll get to help get you off the subspace and ease your fall. You probably won't reach the subspace every time you play, and you might not reach it at all – and that's perfectly fine. Everyone's body reacts differently.