A beginner's guide
What is your deepest, darkest fantasy? In this blog, we will discuss sexual role-playing, an activity that allows people to reproduce components of their deepest desires.
Sexual role-play can take place in both the real world and the digital world, giving participants the power and freedom to act out otherwise impossible sexual fantasies.
Role-playing can offer countless long-term benefits, helping people overcome their sexual inhibitions. It allows them to transform their self-perception, explore new roles and sensations, and deepen partner relationships. Despite what is portrayed in popular media, participants are not required to go to great lengths to realize their role-playing fantasies. Role playing scenes can range into extravagance. From a simple costume and pet name, to a more complex scene that includes scenarios, props and key locations.
What type of people enjoy sex play?
We've already discussed some of the amazing ways role playing can improve our sex lives. Let's take a closer look at some of the reasons people want to incorporate role play into their sex routines:
Sexual replacement
Sexual replacement refers to a person who can switch between submissive and dominant roles during sex. Role play offers couples the opportunity to explore different roles and power dynamics that might otherwise have gone unexplored.
Monogamous sex
Role playing can be a great way to explore a monogamous couple's desires for intimacy with multiple partners. Unlike polyamory, threesomes, and fondling, porn role-playing offers partners the opportunity to experiment with the concept of additional partners before integrating them into the experience.
Holistic sex
Did you know that role playing is used to treat trauma on a biological level? It's true! Role play is used in many forms of sex therapy, CBT (cognitive behavioral) therapy, and exposure therapy to help people express their preferred behavior. It helps them face their fears and change negative thinking about yourself. Role-playing can be a safe space for couples to work through individual sexual stresses together.
Fun and new sex
Of course, the most intriguing reason to try role-playing sex is that it gives you the opportunity to try new sexual activities, personalities, and fantasies. If you want to add excitement to your sex life, seriously consider role playing!
How to prepare for role playing?
Setting boundaries
Choosing characters is just a precursor to setting a good roleplaying atmosphere. We recommend that you have a long conversation with your "scene partner" about the context of your roleplay and the circumstances it puts your characters in.
You may have agreed to play teacher/student with your partner, but what is the nature of your relationship? Are you a naughty student or a teacher's pet? How does your status as a student affect your interaction with your teacher? Will this scene turn into a punishment or a way to get a better grade? These are just a few examples of how the context of your scene can affect the appearance and behavior of your characters.
Completing a yes/no/maybe list before your roleplay can help you determine which narrative (pet names/body part names), activities (style of activities that take place) and aftercare (post-play needs) is required for both participants to enjoy.
Creating safe words
Role-playing is an activity that allows people to step outside of their traditional roles and responsibilities and take on entirely new personas. In order to prevent confusion, couples should use specific safe words when an activity needs to be stopped and other words when the objection is only a component of the character's personality.
A safe word is a pre-arranged word or gesture that signals the end of sexual activity between a dominant and a submissive. The traffic light system is a popular way to include safewords in your experience if you haven't already selected a safeword. The traffic light system uses the colors green, yellow, and red to indicate whether an activity is safe to continue, should be slowed down, or should be stopped.
Building your character
Costumes and props are an important component of many people's role-playing experiences. Even for couples who don't practice role playing often. underwear, BDSM costumes and equipment add realism to your role-playing fantasies They affect the way your character can move, speak and interact in the scene. Costumes set the tone for the scene, conveying details about your scene partner's character's personality.
Is your character dominant? High heels can help improve your posture, allowing you to dominate your partner. Playing the role of a princess? Think of layers of lace that your partner will have to cut through to satisfy you. There are many exciting ways for people to channel their sexual personalities!
Scripting your roleplay scene
People who are serious about role-playing might consider devising their own role-playing scenarios. Creating role-play scenarios allows couples to negotiate in advance the terms of the fantasy they are acting out. Learn all about how to structure and market your roleplay or BDSM scene in our blog
How to overcome jitters during role-playing
If you've ever imagined yourself participating in role-playing sex, then you've probably imagined the myriad of ways you can embarrass yourself in the process. The good news is: role-play sex is just for fun. While you may have a deeper intention to explore roles, it's important to remember that, at the end of the day, sex is just a way for us to experience pleasure and connect with others. If you can accomplish those two things (or even one of those things), then you've accomplished something!
If feelings of dread are holding you back from exploring your roleplay fantasy, consider trying one of these four pre-roleplay tricks:
Get ready for a treat
The moments leading up to any new experience can seem terrifying. One way we can calm these anxieties is to find small ways to try the activity before it even begins. Some examples of this could be for example sexting while in role, watching movies for inspiration and dressing up in costume or sexy lingerie.
Get out of the comfort zone
Going out in public places, like a restaurant or bar, can ease the anxiety about role-playing. After all, your waiter is not going to criticize your performance, because they are not aware that a play is being performed! Starting the scene in a public space and returning to a private space can be an erotic way to increase the excitement before roleplay and get more comfortable with your character.
Quick Orgasm
There is something called the sexual response cycle here. The sexual response cycle refers to the automatic functions that occur as our body prepares for, has, and recovers from sexual activity. Research shows that the part of the brain responsible for making decisions (the lateral orbitofrontal cortex) is temporarily disabled during orgasm, which may explain why it's so easy to get lost in the moment! It can also give us some clues about how we can overcome our fears of role-playing in front of a partner… an orgasm is never a bad opening scene!
Dirty talk
Dirty talk can be a great way to prepare for a role-playing experience because it allows people to experiment with new ways to articulate their desires.
*Sex is the most fun when we have the capacity to laugh at ourselves, and let's be honest: role-play sex creates plenty of opportunities for comic relief. Smile – move on – and discuss how you can improve the experience next time.
The best role play ideas for couples
Are you ready to bring your fantasy to life? We can't wait for you to put this knowledge into practice! If you're still not sure where to start, check out some of the best role-play ideas for couples listed below. This (non-exhaustive) list includes some of the most popular roleplaying themes:
Doctor and nurse / Nurse and patient
Teacher and student
Boss and secretary / Boss and subordinate
Guest and maid
Babysitter and parent
Masseur and patient
Dancer and customer
Photographer and model / Artist and model
Director and actress
Burglar and victim
A policeman and a criminal
Dominant and submissive
Master and slave
Guard and prisoner
Princess and knight
King and concubine
Therefore..
We are sure that since reading this blog you have a general idea and guidance on how to perform sexual role playing without any difficulty. You're left with nothing but… 3, 2, 1 ACTION!